Oh hello there! Has it really been four months? I don’t doubt that. Somehow as the weeks and months in nursing school have gone by, I have personally gone further and further away from the things I love. Yoga? Too tired. Blogging? Have to study. Baking? More studying to do. Pick Parker up early from school? Too much laundry, and there’s that test next week and clinicals tomorrow.
Noticing a theme here? I have been saying “No” to a lot of things I want to do, things that make me joyful and present, and “yes” to things that simply clutter my mind, cause stress, and leave me depleted. Unfortunately this is in some ways part of nursing school. You are told where to be, what time, how to dress, pretty much every day of the week. There are things I can’t say “no” to (a clinical rotation, taking a big exam), but I am trying to learn how to say “yes” to the things I love.
As I read books by strong, vulnerable, and eloquent women like Shauna Niequist or Brene Brown, I realize that maybe this is not just a nursing school thing. Maybe this is a “me” thing. After all, so many women are facing this challenge everyday, whether they stay at home with the kids, have high powered jobs, or were just crazy enough to pursue a nursing degree when their baby was 7 months old. Why am I so tired? Why am I just going through the motions? Where is the joy?
This week I got an email letting me know that my “Penelope Posts” domain name was expiring for the blog. I instantly thought, “well I don’t have time for the blog anymore so I should just get rid of it”. I thought about it for a bit longer and realized how heartbroken I would be if I woke up after graduation and realized my blog wasn’t here anymore.
I started blogging many years ago, not for followers or engagement, but to document my life and have an outlet. I love to write, and love to share and connect with people, and this is the way I can do that. I love to look back on blog posts and see how I was feeling at the time (which is why I am still so bummed that my old blog got deleted). Looking back on posts and pictures fills me up, and reminds me what has brought me joy, and what has brought me down.
I want to document my journey of motherhood and the challenges of remaining mindful and present, and this begins with saying YES to afternoons at the playground, meals cooked with love, lots of yoga and breathing, dates with my husband, and more blogging (OBVS).
What should you be saying YES to?